Monday, November 7, 2011

Off Topic: The Rules

Time again for "The Rules", a semi-regular feature I ripped off from Esquire magazine.

116.  Avoid party guests who use the following words or phrases in casual conversation:  paradigm (or “paradigm shift”), political agenda, Obamacare, bro (or “brah”).

117.  Watching Saturday morning cartoons is still permissible for adults provided you are watching it with your kids (or nieces and nephews).

118. “I know it’s a shitty thing to do, but we can’t refuse to accept the situation”. - Pvt. Cowboy, “Full Metal Jacket” Accept the situation. React accordingly. Or to put it another way. . .

119. It’s okay - even cathartic - to vent. But once you’re “venting” goes past the 15 minute mark, you’re whining.

120. Distrust people who eagerly and unabashedly air their dirty laundry.
Rules, rules, rules are everywhere!


  1. Please add the word "meme" to rule #116.

  2. Rule 117 is bullshit more because my parents to this day watch cartoons 80% of the time (Anamaniacs and that "something and Gromis" show.

    Rule 119 everyone should live by...then I wouldn't want to carry a shank with me at all times.

    1. No - YOU'RE bullshit, cat lady!
      It's "Wallace and Grommit" - great show. You should check it out.